


Cycle of life

by Tuliharja



Series: God of Shinobi and Queen [6]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Aftermath, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hashirama is dead, One Shot, Parent-Child Relationship, cycle of life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-30
Updated: 2018-06-30
Packaged: 2019-05-29 14:56:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15075581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tuliharja/pseuds/Tuliharja
Summary: Mito hadn't signed up for this. Yet it was still bound to happen; you can't stop the cycle of life.





	Cycle of life

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this long ago when I felt the same kind of feeling as a person who has just heard that an important person to them has died. Plus, back then I had been itching to write something like this.

_She felt betrayed._

It wasn't the first feeling she felt though, when she heard the news. At first, she felt disbelief - hell, she even wanted to laugh, as if it was a bad joke. But after the messenger's face didn't turn sheepish, Mito understood it wasn't a joke. It was real. Hashirama was dead.

He really was dead and as unbelievable it sounded it made sense in some bizarre way. Mito could remember the morning so well when Hashirama had left for his mission: birds had chirped happily, and it was sunny, beautiful day. It felt like nothing could go wrong. It felt like a day that you're supposed to spend with someone you love, doing silly things. Like picking flowers, watching children play or just strolling across the village at a gentle pace.

Hashirama going on a mission to solve some kind of border fight was like a mockery of the beauty of the day. It just felt so wrong, yet he had to leave. He was the Hokage and the most powerful person in the village, perhaps even the ninja world. If anyone could solve those fights it was Hashirama.

So he had left, Mito not thinking twice when she had had this small, tiny feeling of doubt deep in her gut. She had dismissed it as a bad sleep, because she hadn't got all that much sleep the night before for some reason. It had left her a bit anxious, yet as the day proceeded her condition became better and soon she had forgotten about all her worries and anxiety. She actually felt happy and excited, because she knew the mission would only take a couple of days for a ninja like Hashirama. She would soon see her beloved husband.

Except she wouldn't. She wouldn't ever again see Hashirama.

_She hadn't signed up for this._

She hadn't agreed to feel these feelings she felt when she heard the news, her being among the first ones to hear about her husband's death. After the first shockwave that reached deep inside of her core Mito felt panic. It was pure and somewhat animalistic panic. She felt like running rabidly or just curling up in bed and never get up. But instead of doing either of those things she had waved off the messenger and left to deal with other things. Because she knew there would be a lot of things to do. She should make sure Hashirama's body would come back to the village in one piece before too much time would go from his death (a half-rotting body wouldn't do much about the public image). Hashirama was such an important figure - no, he _had_ been. The past tense really struck a chord within Mito, who couldn't help but stop right at that moment and feel a wave of coldness wash over her.

She felt how anxiousness washed over her and once again disbelief. This just couldn't happen to her, of all people. She knew Hashirama hadn't been a god, unlike many people had hailed him to be but he was still special, _precious_. Hashirama was the sun that everybody sought when they were having a hard time. He was the rock that made sure everybody would be safe and life itself would be all smiles when he would laugh.

_She wouldn't hear his laugh ever again._

It was something that Mito had at first thought of as an annoying habit of Hashirama's when they had first met because he was loud, stupid and held his emotions on his sleeve. He wasn't tactful and could really embarrass Mito at the worst times possible, but the genuineness behind his behavior made up a lot of it. He truly was a child of nature; he was real and gentle but could be firm when needed. And his temper could be as bad as Mito's if he got angry. Mito had seen it all and each time she couldn't help but wonder why Hashirama had picked her as his wife. Was it because of the alliance between Senjus and Uzumakis? But knowing Hashirama, it was probably because of love or something silly. Hashirama truly had been a strange man and so it was hard to comprehend the fact that he was gone. Though there had been signs. She had both seen and felt them yet she had chosen to ignore them.

She had seen how he wasn't as quick as he had been when they had first met. He was no longer as cheerful as he had been. He had been doing more and more work and stayed later and later each day, it turning into fights and arguments between Mito and him about his lack of time with his family. Everything had adopted shades of grey, which hadn't been there before but were now. And now…now there were even more. Mito felt like everything had turned pitch-black, all colors disappearing. Her sun was gone. Her easy days were over. Everything that Mito had been and could be was thanks to Hashirama.

A sob escaped Mito's lips before tears dropped from her eyes and just like that the gates of sorrow opened. A howl escaped and then rage. She felt like punching something, anything, yet her composure kept together as she knew she couldn't throw a tantrum like some sort of child. She was a grown-up and she had to act like one.

_She couldn't break. She wouldn't._

But as Mito walked outside of their shared home, into the chilly evening air, she felt like the world split half and the half that was Hashirama got lost into the darkness.

" **Hashirama**!" she screamed before falling to her knees, burying her face into her hands, while she could hear the mocking laughing of the Kyuubi inside of her mind.

It was over for Hashirama and they both knew it, because that was the cycle of life. Life and death, death and life. Hashirama had been life itself, but just like it, it had to end. And even though Mito understood this it didn't make her feel any happier. Not even when she felt a hand upon her shoulder. Not even when Tobirama tried to comfort her with awkward words, because everything he said fell upon deaf ears. The pain, the hurt and feeling of betrayal was too fresh in her mind as she cried until there weren't any tears left. The feeling of numbness consumed her, leaving her hollow. But she knew she would get over this. Eventually, because it wasn't like Hashirama hadn't left anything behind himself.

"Mom!" Mito heard before a smaller body than hers crashed against her, making her all wet from tears. She knew she would pull through this, even though the idea without him felt extremely frightening. But if Mito had learned anything from her husband, it was that the future could be as bright as you wanted it to be –after all, you were the one who made your future.

 _'Thank you, Hashirama.'_ Mito though, as she held her crying child. _'And goodbye.'_


End file.
